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Table of Contents
Fall
Leadership Conference
District
President’s Column
Qiyamah’s
Corner
Ministerial
Matters
Lifespan
REflections
Accepting Allies
Chalice Lighters
General Assembly
TJD Board
Retreat
Don't Sleep on
the Dream
District
Calendar
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Accepting Allies
In a recent E-mail opinion poll on a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, one of the responses in favor set himself up as a "true American" and wondered what do gays and lesbians want.
I will be glad to tell him what this gay man wants. First, my partner of 39 years and I have both served honorably in the military. He served in the Air Force, and I in the Army. I want our relationship to be as valued as his is. I want the recognition of my family. I want the removal of laws that single me out for lesser treatment. I want the right for us to live our lives honestly and openly as most of your readers do. As an American citizen I should not have to live in fear that someone might break down our door, harass us or beat us up, deny us work, evict us from our apartments, refuse us needed medical care, or criminalize our unions just because of our sexual orientation.
We are seeking the right to enter into a civil contract. Religions would be free to participate or not. Just as the state shouldn't dictate which marriages any religion performs or recognizes, religions should not dictate who can get a civil marriage license.
I don't understand how gaining legal recognition of our relationships would discourage heterosexuals from getting married. It isn't as if there are a limited number of licenses available that will be taken up by us. It is the most natural thing in the world to want to celebrate finding someone to love. If serial killers in prison can wed, if contests can be held on TV to set up marriages - some even for money, - then how can my partner and I demean the institution? I would think that a divorce rate of over 50%, spousal abuse including murder, absentee fathers who avoid child support, and cheating couples undermine marriage - not loving, same -gender couples.
The General Accounting Office recently published a report that detailed over 1,000 federal benefits that are available to those who are legally married but are denied to us.
When I was younger, gay people were disparaged because they said our love didn't lead to long -term relationships and the rearing of children. Now we are attacked if we want to legalize our relationships and raise families. In the past, we were branded as irresponsible and selfish. Now, we are denounced if we want to serve openly in the military or in the
ministry.
In summary, legal marriage means that our relationship is just as valid as yours. It means we are accorded the rights of full citizenship. It means a recognition and appreciation of our lives. It means I don't have to prove why I should be at the bedside of my loved one. It means that my spouse can be covered by my employer's health plans. It means our
wills cannot be overturned by relatives who hardly knew us. It means all these items that are yours and which are taken for granted.
Frank Benedetti - Accepting Allies
Printed in the Winston-Salem Journal
Accepting Allies GLBT News Around the Region:
Operation rescue has moved to Charlotte from Dallas. This group is especially hostile to gays and lesbians and has already disrupted a Charlotte commitment ceremony for several couples. They sell T-shirts that say "Homosexuality is a sin, Islam is a lie, and Abortion is murder." As UU's, we should be vigilant and ready to respond by presenting our faith's views on these subjects.
The Winston-Salem Superintendent of Schools brought in a speaker whose views on gay youth is that they are "satanic" and can be changed if they would accept Jesus. Local educators were encouraged to attend the discussion held at a local church. Similarly, the Southern Baptist Convention announced a new initiative calling upon their churches to actively "liberate" gays by converting them to heterosexuals through Jesus. They also denounced same sex unions and called upon judges and all public officials to do the same.
Charlotte's Bill James wrote the N.C. Attorney General denouncing the Supreme Court's Texas
Sodomy decision and said that it would lead to "allowing individuals to engage in sex with animals, sex for money, and sex with children."
Those who listen to Mike Savage on MSNBC will now how have to listen elsewhere as he was fired for telling a caller, who he asked if he were gay, to "get AIDS and die."
The Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of the New River Valley is planning a Welcoming Congregation Program for the fall.
Accepting Allies has been invited to speak to members of the Statesboro church in November.
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